On a serious note (and all that nonsense

I've been on this planet for nearly 27 years now (my birthday is on 20th March and don't YOU forget it!) and in that time I have come to terms with a lot of things about myself. First of all I am an 'out of sight, out of mind' kind of person...I prefer to live in the present and now, and although I still think of you often unless you are there in front of me I'm more likely to be concentrating my efforts on something more pressing in the meantime. I realise this sounds almost child-like but I guess it's a kind of coping mechanism to help me remain optimistic and clear-headed and as it is something I have used more and more over the years I find it very difficult to be any different.

Obviously there are certain disadvantages to adopting this attitude, particularly when it comes to family, friends and lovers but as time has gone on my independence and confidence in what I am has become something incredibly important to me so I hope those of you (particularly this person I have in mind) have come to realise this is not thoughtlessness on my part and my feelings havent changed.

Another thing I have found out about myself is that when not in a creative environment I become a lazy-assed chameleon...I blend into my grey, drab and anonymous surroundings, I transform into this 9 to 5 drone who would come home and just sleep all night if I could get away with it. Is this just winter fatigue or has my brain shut down so much that it requires a virtual flood of stimulating ammo before it's raring to go again? Spring? I need you! Hurry up before I'm found comatose, with what's left of my brain matter leaking out of my left ear and creating a puddle on the floor. So tired can't even type properly, where's my flowing style? This post has got more stops and starts than an amateur Go-Karting session!

By the way I've joined Twitter,if you havent heard of it it's like a status update site where you can follow people and they will just give tiny wee updates throughout their day. Stephen Fry updated his account 7 minutes ago saying 'Last scene for me. But at least three more hours on it, I suspect' he is absolutely addicted to it. Am also following Russell Brand and Regina Spektor, I actually feel a little bit like a voyeur, like I'm getting the private inside track on their private lives (along with 45,000 other people). If you want to follow me..in the Twitter sense not of the dark alleyway and holes in walls variety...then just sign up and search for laughingpandora will try keep it up to date with all the goings on in my life (believe it or not is far more interesting than I've been wittering on about here).

Anyhoo, it's 12.35 and my lovely new cosy bed calls.

Ciao Bella
LP X