Burlesque Costumes for Club Noir

So to Club Noir we go....

I don't know about you ladies but I'm not really a pumpkin, robot or ghost-made-out of-old-bedsheets kind of girl. When I think of Halloween I think of luscious ladies and dashing men cut in garb of centuries old, slashes of red here and there, pointy blood dappled nails, devils horns....just the right amount of naughtiness that - let's face it - has prevented us from hanging up the trick or treat bags a long time ago.

Okay I'm a goth at heart but that hasn't done Dita any harm!

Anyhoo, I've had a good think and raked through hundreds of sites to get some ideas about how to approach this whole club noir business and here are the ideas I have come up with, please feel free to adapt, ignore and brazenly nab if you wish:

Usual Suspects (you will most definitely not be the only one on the night sporting this choice of outfit but it can't go wrong and you...will...look... devastating so who cares!)

Can-Can girl
- Tutus Skirt with netting underneath or bustle at the back, corset, fishnet stockings, ankle-length boot shoes, velvet choker, ringlets tied up in a messy french plait at the back, lots and lots and lots of makeup.

20's Flapper
- Flapper dress (or thin strapped slinky dress whatever's easer to find), stockings and suspenders, dolly shoes, pearl necklace, head band with a large feather attached, pale make up, fluched cheeks and cupid bow lips.

Strip-Tease
- This involves wearing the least amount of clothes you feel comfortable with, if you prefer not to bear flesh but still like this idea a mid length trench coat, suspenders and stockings, some gloves and red lippy should see you through.


Marie Antoinette (French Mistress extraordinaire)
- Beehive and ringlets, small bows or cute clasps through hair, pale silk dress with bustle(and netting underneath for added bounce), shoes to match dress, fan, pale powdered skin, pale pink cheeks and a little beauty spot above the lip to finish it off.

Hammer House of Horror Virgin (maybe there are some things that you can't bring back but Halloween is all about pretend anyway ;)
- Get that floor length nightie out thats been hanging at the back of your grannies wardrobe and make sure you are flashing lots of heaving bosom (wonderbra may be required at this point), make a few rips and tears here and there, add a little blood spatter, sexily distressed hair, 60's style eyeliner and pale lips with flushed cheeks. Vampire teeth also if you can wear them that is.

Head of the Orphanage
- This is most defintely a vintage shop job, if you can imagine Nicole Kidman in 'The Hours' with the dark victorian dress and hair piled up on top of the head. This is the more subdued of the outfits so would therefore be more dramatic on someone who is a little more outrageous in their everyday wear.

The Starlets

Dita (the Dream Queen of Halloween)
- Waist-cinching corset, wriggle/pencil skirt, sky-high stilletos, hair set in rollers, pale skin, red lippy, half moon nails and the flashiest jewellery you can find.

Bettie Page (Burlesque's Pinup Girl)
- black basque, suspender belt(see van doren belt from previous blog), stockings, high heels, long gloves, fringe. If you prefer a little more clothing a cute cherry print halter neck dress will do just as well, add a burlesque bow (try 'Little Lily Designs)to finish the outfit off.

Marilyn
- The White Dress. Enough said.

And for the men...

Jack the Ripper - top hat, dark dirty clothing, grizzly face, dark eyes, perhaps some intestine falling out the pocket? You can adapt this character to your own beliefs too, was he a surgeon? or an artist maybe? Lots of fun to be had.

20's shoes shine/paper boy - by far the cutest. Short trouser, long wooly socks, waistcoat with grandfather shirt and tie underneath, all topped off with a flat cap. You can add to this by bringing your own shoe shine brush or a copy of Ye Times of )lde. Prrr is it wrong I find this sexy?

Circus Ringmaster - Don't think you need reminded what a circus ringmaster looks like but just be careful with that whip Ow!

And....em Frank n Furter? - think this is most definitley the one best left to the extroverts out there but I've yet to see a good Frank 'n' Furter so would be pleased to see someone make a good effort at this one on the evening.

Really hope this helps and you all have a great time, and if you need any help sourcing your Burlesque Costume of choice then feel free to email me at girlwiththeredlipstick@googlemail.com

theidparade

I've been out and about a lot this week so I really wasn't looking forward to yet another evening on the tiles (yes even I need to give the vino a rest sometimes)but my fave band of all time were playing so in a superficial attempt at making myself feel better I decided to buy some Sunshimmer Matte Instant Tan in the hope it would make my skin look less like the blue-dirty-dishwater-pallour it had taken on.

After following the instructions, making sure I exfoliated everywhere, extra moisturiser on the elbows etc etc, I applied the lotion as directed. Standing naked in the middle of my living room watching Hollyoaks, flapping my arms wildly, trying to avoid contact with my white walls. After the allocated drying time (God I hope none of my neighbours saw me doing the naked chicken dance through the gap in my curtains) I went to take a look at what I hoped to be the glowing results but was horrified to see my skin was not only blotchy but even with slight pressure the lotion came off!

I was in a rush so in a non-commonsensical effort at saving time I ended up getting a rub down by a sympathetic friend...2 rolls of Andrex later and I looked like a tan and white Jack Russel, thank God for the dark early nights and pub lighting!

Let's just say I wont be using that again in future....

However the good news is there is a new developing suntan lotion out called 'Xen-Tan'. It's not only supposed to smell good it also gives you a nice Jennifer Aniston style light caramel shade that looks quite natural so I shall be buying that in future and using the other stuff as shoe shine for my brown boots.

The band I went to see is called 'the id parade' a 6 piece alternative rock band with a difference. Not only do they introduce a frantic pace and mixture of sounds into their songs, the energy coming from the stage creates an atmosphere you can almost touch...if you were at the Flying Duck on Renfield street last night and you weren't dancing along with 'Against the Law' (their new single) go get your hearing checked! Check out their My Space (click on post title to take you to their page) if my amateur stab at music reviewing hasn't been convincing enough.

Still working on Club Noir outfits so remember and check back here if you are still seeking inspiration.

Px